Thoughts On Work

What a sincere disappointment it has been growing older. Every day a new innocence slips through your fingers and there’s not much to do about it but watch. We value pure trust-worthiness and pure intentions while heralding people who tell us they have these things. Nobody who goes about sharing their virtues with the world really has them. At least not in the capacity that they claim. Why do I even care. I want to, I really do. I want to care because what else do I have in this life besides my spirit. I have nothing else. Everything else fades away and that too cannot be helped. I can only work on maintaining my innocence, my narrow-sighted sincerity of action and the state of my own spirit. It is difficult to maintain yourself in this way because demands are all over the place and it’s as though its a normal expectation to be spread almost completely thin. If you’re not, you’re not working hard enough or not doing enough. Why are things this way? When did this happen to me? I used to be so excited about going to work. Creating espresso used to be such a sincere joy. I would relish in the moment of being beautifully dressed making a beautiful beverage for beautiful people with a team so beautifully aligned with each other in mind, heart and spirit. Somewhere along the way it became a job, something to be dreaded and eventually resented. Then you move on to something else. You move on to something more definitively substantial. Or in other words, you trade a large portion of your values to obtain something necessary that has alternative value. Then you resent your current situation because it took away some now rotted sense of what was your innocence. You no longer feel excited to go to work and that resentment leaks into the way you feel about your new achievements.